“We just bought T-shirts that say Not a Tourist. We can wear them almost anywhere and get away with it. Except at Disney World; everyone there will know we’re lying.”
–Mark Bloom & Jason Scholder (2009)
Don't Even Go There—Travel Writing for the Rest of Us
Even if the world is your oyster, you can still chip a tooth on its shell. While travel magazines feature exotic locales of breathtaking beauty, we expose sites so depressing that no traveler this side of Edgar Allan Poe would venture there without a tub-load of tranquilizers. Take Las Vegas (please) and the $5.99 all-you-can-eat buffet line at Sam’s Town. That's the world we explore at Don’t Even Go There.
On this site, we tell of places we’ve visited but wish we hadn’t. We reveal vacation plans gone awry and relate horror stories from the road best abandoned. These true stories reflect where we’ve chosen to go. We only have ourselves to blame. We rarely needed to exaggerate—the truth really is stranger than a Dan Brown novel.
Don’t Even Go There: travel tips for those of us who aren’t escorted by security guards, pampered by wealthy benefactors, or provided a generous per diem. This blog is for seasoned travelers and armchair tourists who want the real world first-hand and head-on, with all its drama, horror, and humor. You’ll laugh at us, cry with us, and decide to stay home more often.
20 August 2009
Quote of the Month
We sometimes succumb to souvenir shopping. It’s shameful, we know. The worst souvenirs are the T-shirts that shout the name of some hell hole we visited for a half hour while waiting for bail money (although you have to admit not many others wear their Kansas State . . . Prison T as proudly as we do). Anyway, we recently found the perfect souvenir. Almost.